Most women are taught that to become successful and reach your economic potential, you need to have a ‘thick-skin’.
The problem is that your thick-skin is also what is keeping you stuck, scared and suffering from ‘not-enough’. Women are searching for meaning, passion and purpose so they can rise up the corporate ladder or turn profits as entrepreneurs, most are still fumbling through because confidence, a massive part of self-love is missing.
Business love is a term I made up to be honest. I believe we all have a deep seated love for business. Actually, I believe that it’s our purpose to discover how to take our experiences, knowledge and wisdom and help the greater economy thrive because of what we’ve endured. Business love is really the art of creating money via ideas with impact.
Legacy love is another term I made up. Your legacy is important. Many women don’t consider what they’re going to leave behind until they’re leaving it behind. I believe our happiness and the sense of “being enough” comes from working towards making a difference and leaving that difference behind once we pass away.
If you combine these three concepts, it’s easy to see why so many women are struggling to reach their economic potential. It’s my vision to help a million women reach their economic potential by 2025.
Enclosed are 3 keys to help you tie self-love, business love and legacy love together so that you can get started today.
Key #1 – Depersonalize Rather Than Internalize
Ok so we’ve been told to wear a thick skin. But internalizing what is happening personally and professionally will never help you gain traction, in fact that’s the very thing that’s keeping you from earning what you deserve. Instead consider the subtle difference between depersonalizing and internalizing. Depersonalizing means not making situations personal. Internalizing means attaching situations to your sense of integrity and self-esteem. When it comes to reaching your economic potential, depersonalizing is an act that must be practiced and learned by women so that the three loves can connect and you can excel.
Some simple steps to help you depersonalize are:
- Take assumptions out of the equation.
- If you’re assuming something you’re missing out on opportunities always. Ask questions and approach situations with civility and curiosity.
- Don’t believe people ‘know better’ or are purposely trying to be malicious or mean.
- The way people behave is a product of collective experiences which means not everyone is going to talk the way you do or think how you do. That doesn’t mean they don’t like you, it simply means they’re different.
- Stop trying to prove you’re enough.
- Have you ever noticed that people who are confident or ‘enough’ in their own eyes, don’t feel the need to prove to others that they are capable or ‘enough’. When you depersonalize, you’re able to just show up knowing that who you are and what you’re offering is enough.
Key #2 – Choose Your Perspective & Mindset
Self-love, business love and legacy love require you to choose what you’re thinking about and what you’re focusing on. Research shows that your thoughts affect your DNA minute to minute. Interestingly, there aren’t a lot of programs that teach you how to critically think through situations or help you train your thoughts so that they work for you rather than against you. Many are unaware that you can choose your perspective, your thoughts and your mindset in any situation, but you have to learn how to do this and practice it. When it comes to reaching your economic potential, your perspective and mindset will affect every behaviour you adopt and every action you take – ultimately affecting your results.
Some simple steps to choose your perspective and mindset:
- If you are looking at a situation and only seeing 2 options, look for a third or how to make both options work.
- When you lose the mindset, “You’re either with me or against me” personal, professional and economic potential changes because your perspective and mindset is no longer one sided.
- Women need to talk through situations due to the way the female brain is wired. Men compartmentalize.
- When it comes to mindset and perspective talk through it but do not gossip. Work your way through the situation but then once you’ve taken stock, decide and act, then let the situation go. If you don’t know how to do this, take a course to help you make this part of your daily habits.
- Keep your eye on the end goal.
- What is your goal for economic potential and your legacy? Consider if your mindset supports it. If not learn how to shift your thinking to align with your end goal. Your economic potential requires you to keep a constant connection to your end goal on a daily basis. Start a ritual or mindset practice to help you establish this connection.
Key #3 – Allow Yourself To Be Seen
Your thick skin is part of old philosophies and societal conditioning. History tells us that allowing yourself to be seen is scary. In actuality, when you allow yourself to be seen is not scary – it’s liberating! Seriously, if you’re doing the best you can, going further in your personal and professional development, putting it all out there at the end of the day – even when you’re a mess – you’ll always belong. You’ll always belong because belonging starts with self-love and respect. When you’re hiding out, trying to be ‘perfect’ before you share, dare or do, you can’t belong to yourself never mind your environment. To reach your economic potential you must learn and lean in to being seen for your creative ideas and the legacy you want to leave behind one day. And, it’s ok if not everyone likes it because it’s not about them, it’s all about being comfortable with who you are and where you are.
Some simple steps to allowing yourself to be seen:
- Every person matters – including yourself.
- Your story matters – regardless of how boring or exciting, how tumultuous or peaceful – what you’ve experienced and how you see the world is unique. If you remember this you’ll approach every opportunity knowing you have something to offer rather than fearing being good enough. Ask more questions about who you are, what you stand for and what you want. Allow your life to matter.
- Innovation begins with imagination and creativity.
- Being seen is what signals opportunity and options to appear. Often people think legacy is luck – but luck can’t happen without preparation and planning and then being in the right place. The same is true with innovation. Being seen for your imagination and creativity enables all sectors of the economy to ripple forward.
- Where you are now is not your final act.
- You have to start somewhere – no matter how old you are. Today, Vera Wang, is one of the premier world designers for women, but she was a figure skater and journalist before entering the fashion industry at age 40. Julia Child didn’t write her first cookbook until she was 50, launching her career as a celebrity chef. Laura Ingalls Wilder spent her later years writing stories, using her daughter as her editor – she only published the “Little House” books at age 65 in 1932.
Today, look at what your life is like. If you don’t like it identify what you don’t like. Then identify what you do like. Decide to make self-love, business love and legacy love your ultimate outcome and take time daily exploring how you’ll go after it by depersonalizing, choosing your mindset and learning to be seen.
Need help? Choose a free course today!
CEO & Founder of Wealthy Woman Warrior™
Andrea created her proprietary mindset training, Power To Thrive™ over 15 years ago. We're now in a time where one's environment is constantly changing and pushing people mentally to their limits - if you don't have tools in place to help you navigate disruption, you simply need to get it. Invest in your mind and your success will follow.
Andrea Carter is on a mission to empower 1 million women to reach their economic potential by 2025. She believes that through collaboration and these 5 pillars women can rise to relevance.