Find out what’s missing in 7 minutes

Are you a Women Who Stutters (WWS) struggling with confidence?

Confidence is a skill that everyone wants. It can often vanish instantly, leaving one feeling hopeless and helpless.  When you are a Woman Who Stutters, finding and actively employing confidence becomes considerably more difficult.  First, you have the situation or interaction that may be inhibiting and stressful.  Then, wanting to speak fluently and say what you want to, adds another layer of anxiety, tension and vulnerability.  You likely won’t know if you are going to stutter.  So the looming question is: Will you be able to express exactly what you want in a clear and intelligent manner?

Is building self-confidence for Women Who Stutter more complicated?

Let’s look at 5 reasons why this may be true:

  1. Women who stutter lack confidence in being heard, making a difference and standing up for who they are.  It happens because they often see stuttering as a burden to confidence.
  2. Women have the ability to think multi-dimensionally and understand varied aspects of discussion simultaneously.  This conflicts with the many mental tasks involved in keeping stuttering under control.  Therefore, when expressing their thoughts, clear thinking and easy speaking are compromised.
  3. Stuttering impacts self-worth adding to embarrassment, shame and anxiety.  Expressing valuable ideas and contributions are undermined, as is confidence.
  4. Women often doubt their knowledge and skills, then over think and second guess their thoughts, thus sabotaging putting their unique perspectives forward.
  5. Women who stutter have high standards for approval and perfection, from both themselves and others. Dysfluent speech shatters these values.

Wealthy Woman Warrior - Linda Hurkot - stuttering and self confidence

For Women Who Stutter Self-Confidence doesn’t have to remain complicated or out of reach:

Would it be helpful to know how self-confidence is within your reach and can be accessed faster than you think?

Imagine in under 7 minutes…feeling more confident – let’s try it together now!

Step #1:

Consider making a phone call to book your interview for a job application – immediately your focus is on trying not to stutter right?  Your confidence is out the window in a heartbeat… and that’s ok because let’s look at step #2.

Step #2:

Shift your focus from the conversation to the question that you’re curious about.  For example, what time can you set the interview for?

Instead of worrying about not stuttering, focus on the answer that works for your schedule and theirs.  Placing your focus on the timeline,  knowing you’ve been called for an interview already, strengthens your confidence automatically – they already want you!

Step #3:

Practice going through your schedule with times that don’t work for you and suggesting alternatives in your calendar.  If you practice this with the focus on the outcome of setting a date and time, you’ll find that your speech and confidence flow more fluidly.

Practice this by speaking out loud because you know as well as I do, that when you speak it in your mind you don’t stutter.  For Women Who Stutter, it’s when you begin to talk that the stuttering actually happens.  Alleviate this by practicing the situation in real time and focusing only on the solution.

Go ahead – give this a try.

You can use a different topic if you like, but try the 3 steps and then leave me a comment below.

 

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Linda Hurkot is a communication enhancement ambassador for People Who Stutter, specializing in women who stutter. Linda helps professional women who stutter integrate speech into a natural way of communicating with a proprietary program called, The Easy Speaking for Stutterers’ program.